
Dominic Regan is in the mood for some end-of-term high-jinx
Ennui. Boredom. Call it what you will but we have reached that time in the year when a bit of mischief is justified. Here are a few tried and tested antics.
- Flag down a taxi and ask the driver for the right time.
- Go into a shop, select an item and then tell the assistant you have unilaterally decided to reduce the price by 30%. For some inexplicable reason this is known as “doing a Grayling”.
- If ever you suspect you have been overcharged by a supplier wait five years and then, rather than asking for a refund, announce that you are going to launch a public enquiry. This too is known as “doing a Grayling”. It is beyond me.
- Ring the clerk to the barrister you most despise and ask if counsel is free to do a week before the Supreme Court or a three month trial in the Bahamas. Leave it there.
- People walking and texting simultaneously drive me mad, particularly when crossing the road. Bursting a balloon next to their ear is